Weekly Divination - proper manners please

[Hope]

sit up straight, do not slouch
please and thank you
put your napkin in your lap

funny we seem to see those as the "proper manners" most everyone that reads those words has probably heard them and at the very least can place them in to a context that makes sense

So what does that have to do with divination?

Well funny you should ask - that is our discussion starter this week!

What are the proper manners when asking for a reading, and what are the proper manners after one has received a reading?

No finger pointing or name calling please ;)


love
t

[aranarose]

Please and thank you are always appropriate, as well as responding to the questions of the reader.

[TheWomanMonster]

feedback is usually appreciated.
as is not expecting them to answer all your questions.
or pestering or pressing the reader to do more for you.

arguing about things that they mention isn't cool.
a simple, "I don't think that applies to my life" is prefered over "no f'ing way! I'd never do that!"


I like polite people,
please, thank you and a general sense of appreciation for the service, that's all I ask.

[aranarose]

arguing about things that they mention isn't cool.
a simple, "I don't think that applies to my life" is prefered over "no f'ing way! I'd never do that!"


To which I say, "Okay," and then wait six months for them to come back for another reading because it happened that way after all. :gagged:

[Windsmith]

On a forum like this one, a decorous waiting period after receiving a reading is in order. Getting your reading and then coming back to the same pool of diviners the next day and saying, "X's reading sucked; who wants to give me a good one?" is a definite no-no.

Also, give people a chance to read and respond to your request. When someone posts a request at 11:00 in the morning and then adds a second post 2 hours later saying, "Oh, well, nobody here wants to help me; I guess I'll go somewhere else," it does nothing to endear them to the people they claim to want help from.

There's certain etiquette for a person giving a reading, too. Unless you're reading for yourself, you can't know everything about your querent. If they say that what you're telling them is in no way relevant to your life, saying "Let me see how else I might interpret this rune" or even "What sense do you get from this card?" is infinitely preferable to "Yuh-huh!" As an example, from a Tarot reading my mom had done about 5 years ago:

READER: You're in a new marriage.
MOM: No.
READER: Yeah. It's right here.
MOM: I've been married to the same man for 25 years.
READER: Well, he's going to leave you in the next 2 years.
MOM: I don't think so.
READER: The card don't lie.

The cards may not lie, but we who are interpreting them are human, and therefore fallible. A little humility is in order.

Also, that reader was chomping gum the entire time. Don't do that.

[aranarose]

I tell students and clients that the cards don't lie, but I might not be seeing them right that day, so if what I'm saying doesn't make sense to me, please, please tell me instead of wasting both our time with a reading that isn't going to do you any good at all!

[LisaT4P]

Many many kudos to Windsmith!

Also, for people in person: don't pick your nose, eat, chew your nails or otherwise dirty your hands and then expect for me to let you touch my cards. If we are in a public place, and I choose not to read because a table is dirty (I don't always carry a cloth), please respect that.

Feedback is super important. If I say something that resonates with you then please give me a detailed explanation as to why. I may not like to have too much info. up front for a reading, but I do like to know why I saw things and how I might see them better in the future.

If something doesn't resonate with you, let's talk about it. Don't assume your reading "sucked". Let's chat and I'll tell you why I think the card means what I said, and then see if it makes sense. I'm always willing to work with the client to discover anything that I might have missed or explain things that both of us might not understand.

[BlackLili]

Thus far, everyone's had great points.

Please and thank yous are a must.

If the Queriant has a specific question, it's usually good to mention that up front when asking for a reading.

For Readers, it is polite to ask the Queriant if they want their reading public or private; in person this can mean going off somewhere separately, online moving a discussion to PMs is generally sufficent for privacy.

Impressions/reactions are almost always welcome, as has been said, if for no other reason than to give the Reader a clearer picture of the Queriant they're reading for.

If we're online, such as in the Member-to-Member reading forum, it is polite also to publically post some sort of reaction to reading requests. (I think it's mentioned in teh Rulz also.) Even so much as a "X got my reading and we're discussing it entirely over PM," would be sufficent, I would think. Just so others aren't wondering if they owe anyone a reading still.

Beannachtai,
BL

[Windsmith]

don't pick your nose, eat, chew your nails or otherwise dirty your hands and then expect for me to let you touch my cards.Eeeeewww...this happens? More than once? Wow, this makes me so glad the only people I've read for in person either 1) have almost obssessive cleanliness tendencies or 2) a slight fear of my cards (what is it about Queen Victoria that gives people the willies?!?).

[SilverClaw]

Oh boy ( lol ) here we go. First off I agree with a lot of the comments in the previous posts. So here is some other things that I look for.

For in person and online readings manners are appreciated, as well as not being stoned or intoxicated cause otherwise I just do not read for you plain and simple. And if that happens being informed ahead of time a reading will have to be rescheduled is also appreciated.

Before I start a reading I explain to the person what the cards can and cannot do for them and if they want to proceed and then take it from there and if not well then we do not.

If the person I am reading for is spacing out and gawking around instead of paying attention I will stop doing the reading and ask if the want to continue and remind them if they are not interested it taking the reading seriously please stop wasting my time.

Feed back is appreciated and if they have any questions to feel free to ask. If extra readings need to be done or other means of divination need to be used I offer especially if it is something I feel strongly that needs to be done, however if they do not want it I do not do it.

I do not post readings in the forum period and would ask that it is respected that the querent does not post it either. It is just the way I do things and have done them here for the almost 4 years I have been here.

So ya that is just a few things that came to mind when I read the topic for discussion :)

[LisaT4P]

Eeeeewww...this happens? More than once? LOL It was an extreme example. I was looking @ my sons as I typed it. :smileroll

But, people do expect readings in bars, or in places like restaurants... and they have just eaten ribs, or the table is dirty, etc.

Yeah, I hope I never have to post something explaining how to clean boogies off of cards. roflmao :T