Theres
October 12th, 2004, 02:32 AM
an interesting thing happened tonight. i taught a Wicca class again, and i'll be doing it once more next week.
this is something i did for about 5 years, but i got to the point where i didn't feel i had anymore to give. in fact i actually felt that it was sucking something away from me. i found myself repeating the same stuff over and over, but i wasn't buying it myself anymore. the final straw was when i started a class because i needed the money, even though my heart wasn't in it anymore.
so i told that class that i would finish the prescribed term for free, and when it was over i just quit. i didn't feel compelled to "widen the circle" anymore, and i felt like a mercenary for taking money for something i just couldn't put my heart into.
over the years i had often sat in as a sub for my teacher Cleda's current classes, and that didn't seem like such a bad thing. but she knew where i was at now, and asked for my help less and less. however, when she told me she was going to need someone to take her class for a few weeks i just couldn't say no. so tonight i sat in as her substitute (although i could NEVER replace her!).
it was fun. i had a good time despite my reservations, and her newest class is a good bunch. she was starting the section on herbs, and her favorite way to introduce them to this is by making bath salts. so we played with oils and herbs and colors, and at the end of the night everyone was charged and happy, including me!
next week i take them through an 'introduction' to ritual tools (not all of them are total newbies), and i'm actually looking forward to it.
wow, who'd a thunk it?
this is something i did for about 5 years, but i got to the point where i didn't feel i had anymore to give. in fact i actually felt that it was sucking something away from me. i found myself repeating the same stuff over and over, but i wasn't buying it myself anymore. the final straw was when i started a class because i needed the money, even though my heart wasn't in it anymore.
so i told that class that i would finish the prescribed term for free, and when it was over i just quit. i didn't feel compelled to "widen the circle" anymore, and i felt like a mercenary for taking money for something i just couldn't put my heart into.
over the years i had often sat in as a sub for my teacher Cleda's current classes, and that didn't seem like such a bad thing. but she knew where i was at now, and asked for my help less and less. however, when she told me she was going to need someone to take her class for a few weeks i just couldn't say no. so tonight i sat in as her substitute (although i could NEVER replace her!).
it was fun. i had a good time despite my reservations, and her newest class is a good bunch. she was starting the section on herbs, and her favorite way to introduce them to this is by making bath salts. so we played with oils and herbs and colors, and at the end of the night everyone was charged and happy, including me!
next week i take them through an 'introduction' to ritual tools (not all of them are total newbies), and i'm actually looking forward to it.
wow, who'd a thunk it?