ShamanFeather
December 21st, 2004, 12:47 AM
The past couple of years for me has been a very dark storm filled with a lot of grief, extreme stress, tears and near breakdown conditions. My fiance has been dragged through the dirt with me and although we have recently began to claw our way back out it seems that their is the sound of distant thunder once again. Although I believe that adversity can make one stronger I am ready for some good breaks. My job and his job both are killing us physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritualy being around very draining and negative influences never mind the jobs themselves, but practicality seems the best way. We have been looking for jobs but yet our families seem to loom on the sidelines. It has gotten so bad in the past that I am often afraid to check the mailbox or even my voice messages. I can not take another storm. I don't want another financial thunderbolt to tear through the very small forest that has begun to spring up for either of us. I think that I am beginning to heal just a bit from the abuse that I suffered, but at the same rate it often feels that if one to metaphorically draw me I would still be a rather gory figure. Please send whatever energy you feel most appropriate. I have been doing what I can ritualy, with reiki and La Ho Chi, listening to Guides, looking for jobs and doing all of the down to earth stuff to match, but I really need this help now and so does my fiance. There has been to much fear which is the product of the wounds of years of abuse, I need healing, but also financial security so that I don't have to live paycheck to paycheck and yet be in more debt then I can imagine. The distant thunder could risk us having a place to live, I just really want to be worried about something other then the basics found at the bottom of Maslows heirarchy of needs. I want to stop the storm before it pounds any harder. I hate to ask for energy from people. I feel like I take too much already sometimes.
*lights a candle in a crevice of a rock face to look over the valley through the dark of the night*
Thank you.
*lights a candle in a crevice of a rock face to look over the valley through the dark of the night*
Thank you.