Price of a dream deferred

[Bellefoy]

Hopefully at least some of you will recognize the quote I've paraphrased above. <smile >
On a more serious note, I've spent ALOT of time over the past few days thinking about dreams that I've given up or "permanently deferred" for the sake of practicality/conformancy. And I thought I'd see what stories people on this board have to tell about dreams lived/chances taken, or deferred, and how they feel about those choices.

[Rowenna]

Because of some bad choices I've made in my life, I've had to give up nearly every dream I ever had. But I take full responsibility for my choices and try to make the best of the way my life is now, and I do always have hope for the future.

[-Ember]

I've given up a lot to make the "right choices"... and reget much because of it. There still is always something more I could/should have been doing by those standards, none of the sacrifices of self I made were enough... and yet I cut away at myself until there was so little left to give that I could barely keep myself alive.

I love art and crafts. I don't know if I'm really any good at them. I think I am, I've been told I am. But no matter how well I've carved a block of wood into a statue or soldered glass fragments into a interplay of colored light... it is "just a hobby". It can't be anything meaningful because the second it is I get pressured about "potential" and how I have to do something meaningful, "make something" of myself because I'm "sooo intelligent" and owe it to everyone one who has invested in me. Even the hobby level is frowned on. I've internalized more of that than I would like to admit.

My biggest dream: I just want to have a simple job that pays the bills and gives me enogh time and resources to do the things I love. I don't want to be our educational system's sacrificial goat anymore, providing my schools with an example of a "successful" student making something of herself and dragging up testing averages with near perfect scores. I don't want to feel like everyone is disappointed when I don't follow a high profile and/or high income career. I don't want to be the token success anymore. I don't want my "hobbies" highjacked to where they only count if they are good enough to be displayed or sold.

[~Elise~]

I've deferred my dream of moving to N. Calif...or just the ocean, I don't care where, just near the ocean for another year because of my new love in my life. He wants to stay close as he can to his son until he can decide to live with us.

(my dream/goal has been to move to N. Calif when my son graduates from HS this year...which I guess, I'd really deferred it the first time for my son, now that I think of it. If it was up to me, I'd be there already.)

Do I regret this--not at all. I feel the price is worth it. Although--I just hear a gull or see the ocean and it tugs at me, soul deep. But--Rick is MORE than worth staying here in Oklahoma for another year. So--here I stay until I can go.

Elise

[Bellefoy]

Woohoo! People answered! :-) Thanks. I really appreciate your responses. I guess the quote in my sig line just wasn't cutting it for me, and I needed to post and hear from others! I've made some sacrifices that I feel are very much worth it (cutting some corners to make sure I had the necessary $ for some cat-care expenses, for one), and some that I regularly kick myself for (such as not going for a graduate degree immediately upon finishing my undergrad degree). It was great to read your positive responses, and see examples of how things can be if I'd just stop *thinking* about past choices and start *living* a bit more.