What if religions were computer labs/networks ?

[TheTempestuous1]

LOL.. found this on another website.. thought you guys might enjoy it! Any ideas for other relgions/ comp networks that weren't listed?

(no offense meant for the followers of any religion or users of any operating system !)

Judaism: the VMS lab.

Ancient, outdated, huge and insanely complicated servers, nothing can work flawlessly for a day without the constant supervision of the sysadmin. The rules of using the systems consist of pages and pages of small print, and include not only the usual security policies, but go into great depth to describe a zillion restrictions, like the maximum and minimum length of filenames, or the characters allowed in filenames. The sysadmin has a habit of spying on users and getting nasty with the offenders. However the users devised many cunning workarounds to achieve what they want, usually in inconvenient and complicated ways but without formally breaking the rules.

Christianity: Windows NT/2000 network.

Machines of all shapes, sizes and versions, some are loaded with all the flashy and modern stuff, some are almost bare-bones, but all are connected to the central server. There are just 10 rules for the lab usage, they are simple and obvious; but even if you break them, usually it's enough to email the sysadmin and apologize, as long as you sound sincere. A long time ago the management had sent a young sysadmin to the lab with the purpose of upgrading and fixing all the computers, but in the process of his work he discovered a lot of unlicensed warez and gamez. The users were angry about the intervention and almost managed to get the admin fired; since then, he's very tolerant with the users, doesn't venture outside his office, and is available only by email or phone calls.

Wicca: Linux network.

Each computer is running a slightly different version of OS (after all, there are dozens or maybe hundreds to choose from, and you always can build your own from scratch !), but all of them are based on the wonderful free software project. The network is run by a couple of geeks who encourage the users to learn programming and to maintain their own machines. The users are allowed a lot of freedom, the only official rule is to "harm none", i.e. releasing viruses and hacking into others' computers is forbidden. You can connect your machine to a computer cluster and run some powerful programs together, or you can work alone.

Voodoo: network of Win95/98/ME machines.

This network is run by a bunch of "hackerz kidz". The machines are not overly stable but fun, flashy and easy to use. It is the only network which allows *everything*, including viruses and cracker activities, and most of the users take advantage of that. The admins are a lot of fun, they frequently chat with the users or come to the lab to drink beer and play games together. However some of them are really nasty and vindictive, so the users are advised to be careful and not to get on their bad side. It's common to be buddies with a few admins (you can buy them beer, chocolate or whatever they prefer) so they will protect your machine from the other users and will stand for you if other admins would want to make you problems.

[Xander67]

LOL

[Ravens_Tears]

tee hee hee

[shnen]

hehehe!

[Corvis Canis Latrans]